As I walk down this path.
Why I started this channel, who I am, what I am where I come from. I don't like countless others. But I want to give you my reasoning . What has happened to me, maybe will help others. The whole goal is to help others find themselves . So here, I'm walking, as I'm dictating . I grew up in the 50s and 60s. Basically 63 years old now. I grew up in the 50s 60s 70s, like any other child. We weren't rich. We were borderline poor. But we never, ever. Didn't have clothes on our back or food and economics. Our parents worked hard. As hard as parents to do. At those times, doing their very best. We didn't get everything we wanted, but we will never neglect, except it was probably the most important, and we were neglected. Our parents. My parents. I speak are because I had a brother and a sister, never really touched us told us they loved us. There was really no affection. There was no closeness there was no bonding.You might get a smile. Out of my mother. But she never go out of her way to tell you that she loved you, she was proud of you, and touch you.
Father, Nothing , he was working, most of the time when he wasn't working was sitting at a bar somewhere. So, they did what they could.
At the time, and in retrospect, they did their best, but we lacked one thing, probably the most important thing that was loving . Fortunately, we all grew up good, that kind of environment, could have led to very bad things people's futures, but again, because of the people that we we grew up throughout my entire life. Due to this, upbringing, this raising of no affection no love, not really understanding what's the word. I love the names, other three simple words. It was hard on me. It was hard of my relationships and a lot of them failed due to that and that I couldn't reciprocate show my love, because I didn't know how I was never taught what you're supposed to do. I meant it by the words. I thought I could feel it in my heart. But I didn't know. Yes, I went through a couple of marriages. And then fell apart, probably due to this entire reason. Knowing this, I struggled and struggled and struggled for years, my whole life till about three years ago. I always felt. I wanted to know what love was. I wanted to feel love. I want to be able to feel that and I want to know what it feels like. thoughts going through my head all the time. All the time. Again, the most of my entire adult life. And then, about two years ago, I guess you could say my prayers were answered. Two years ago I had what I consider a lucid dream.. It was unlike any other dream I've ever had in my life, and I've ever had steps, and probably will never have again. As long as I walked this planet. But I remember the dream vividly to this day. Most of my dreams fade kind of away and you start losing them. What they really were not just this one. But here's what it was. I want to say again about two years ago I had a dream. I was looking at myself in the dream. Self, I can vividly remember. I'm the dreamer, standing here, and facing me about three or four feet away with me. Looking back I was looking at myself. There was no expressions on my face whatsoever. There wasn't a word in this dream. I was looking at myself and we were separated by about four or five feet in between us. Okay, now me as the dreamer. Okay yeah myself looking back in between that sat.... What I want to say was a female with their back towards me the dreamer, so I couldn't see her face. I saw a long dark black hair. And she was just sitting between us. and here is the beauty of this dream. There was a feeling of love generate that I had never felt in my life. Never. There's really no words to explain it but it was total bliss and love. All the pressures. All the temptations. All the good all, everything was just washed away, and there was only one feeling. It was of this, I want to call it, extreme love and good feeling. Again, unlike anything I've ever experienced in this world. And probably, unlike anything I will ever experience as long as I walk. This plane. I woke up after that dream. I don't know how long lasting. Okay, so my first thoughts were, please. Please take me back. I don't want to be here. Take me back. I want to feel that again. I didn't, I never went back and never had to deal with and close to that ever getting that realization I probably never. But that was my awakening, what did I take from that dream, others and we're all going to have the ability to feel this unbelievable laughs It's in each and every one of us. We all have here on Earth. Here in this existence. It may be masked, it may be covered up. It may be pushed down down down deep into our realms of our psyche, but it's there for everybody, and we're all going to be able to feel that some day... that is the love that we need for all today to get our world back that long. Once you feel this. Once you experiences, your life will never be the same. I was given a gift to be your adult that has changed my life And ever since. Because this boy, this empty. Empty cavity unloving personality to feel love like I did. There's hope for everybody. We're all get there someday we'll all experience. And it is a beautiful, wonderful feeling. Nothing to fear nothing at all. So that was my awakening. That's what changed me in my life. That's a little bit about me. That's what I wanted to bring this site off for to hold these opinions to share these opinions. You know they say if you plant the seed and the tree grows, you do lose it. All you need to do is plant one seed one tree girl. You've done Wow, that's what the website is about. This was about me. This was my turning point in life. And if anyone else had something like this I sure would like to talk with him about it. Thank you.